smells like bacon

The past couple of weeks have been kind of fun. I went kayaking for the first time, yea I just turned 28 and I've never been kayaking until last week. First time for everything. We saw some huge manatees right below our kayaks! Am I spelling kayak right? Anyway, they were so beautiful, I wish I had a waterproof camera, ugh. Some of the guys I was with got out of their boats and swam with the manatees a little bit, even pet them. They are so huge yet so gentle, the manatees that is.

I've been working at a tennis camp the past couple of weeks. Last week was a little rough. I had middle school boys and all they wanted to do was complain and whine. This week has been a lot better though. These kids are interesting. One girl is sooo hyper and screams a lot. She almost busted my eardrum the other day. She also is into anime and brought me this book to show me that she had been reading. I can't remember what it was called, Antique bookshelf or something? The same day she came up to me and was trying to hide behind me because they were all playing hide and go seek after camp and she told me I smelled like bacon. I told her I like to bathe in bacon everyday so that was probably why. THe same day ANother girl in my group pipes up on the way to lunch and says really loudly, "I just caught a dragonfly with my armpit." Kids are so weird.....

the jam session was a success!

i've been applying for jobs for the summer the past few weeks and i was starting to freak out because my current job will be over next week because school will be out and i have been desperately trying to find something for the next couple of months. and just this week i got two job offers that kind of just plopped in my lap. one is at a summer tennis camp (which is perfect) and the other is teaching a basic photography class at the art center on campus at florida state. i just walked into the art center yesterday to ask how much it was to use the darkoom and the woman behind the counter literally asks me "you need a job" and there it was. man, i have to say somebody is definitely looking out for me....

i also played open mic night by myself for the first time ever on tuesday night. just me and my guitar. it was at this place in town called Bird's Aphrodisiac Oyster Shack. i also had a special incentive to play at this particular open mic because the first person who signed up and played got a $25 tab. guess what, i was that person. it wasn't too bad actually. i played two lucinda williams songs and the crowd was very gracious. all 5 or so people. hehe. there were a few more people than that, but i think that was a good size for my first open mic. i didn't even bring a pick up for my guitar so i had to borrow the guitar of another girl at the bar. i got a few compliments on my voice so that made me feel good. i definitely need more work on my guitar skills. oh well, in due time.

1987 Badass

I wrote this over the last few months. It's about my brother Terry and the experiences I've had with him over the years. I want to make it into a song but I still haven't found the right chords yet.

Bleach blonde hair and that tan you got from mowing lawns all summer.
In your Black muscle shirt and Crisp white jeans against leaning against the doorway.
Could've given Don Johnson a run for his money.
Still wearing your sunglasses inside. A future too bright to hide.
Thought you had it going on, little did I know your mind was already gone.
But you were still the first born, my big brother I thought was having all the fun.......until one day, like the prodigal son you came walking up the driveway, but there was no grace for you, only hell to pay. Seemed like we were just drawing pictures together of the sharks you caught off the coast of Pascagoula. They had some hope for you on that boat, until mom and dad found out you used all the money you made to buy dope. You blamed Capt. Big Red, you said he was such a cutthroat. All the while I was back home staring at your Dio record cover, thinking about my big badass brother.....and why it was you had to leave as I put Holy Diver back in its sleeve.

1987 Badass, dad said you'd never last,
1987 badass, I love you so stuck in the past

You hocked my cd player for some drugs on Decker drive
I should have been mad but I was glad you were still alive
Living in some abandoned house just down the street, dad wouldn't even let you in to get something to eat. Crawling back home through the window while we were all asleep, laying on that mattress on the laundry room floor. I could hear dad trying to push down the door yelling “don't come around here no more.” You didn't rest you didn't sleep, the voices kept you up all night and so did we...

They sent you down to the Keys to get yourself a job. Thought it'd straighten you out, give you a new start. Little did we know the hell that you went through. When that truckdriver brought you home, dad could have killed you. The beach was your home down there, sleeping on the sand in the naked night air. Trying to talk to you, no one knew what to do, there were no reasons for the things we all went through.

1987 Badass, dad said you'd never last.
1987 Badass, I love you so stuck in the past

Driving down river road, taking pictures by the cemetary. The moments we both shared were never arbitrary. Looking for some magical power lines or plastic pink flamingos. Never stopped driving till we found our treasures, taken with us in a second in our cameras forever.

The first of every month going to the dollar store, looking for the perfect trinket to adorn your special room. You had it perfectly arranged so you could save us all from doom. Every object had its place, you said your art was your saving grace.

Hitchhiking for miles in the Louisiana heat, with your black trench coat still on as we pass you on the street. Coughing for another cigarette and I wrestle with the thoughts. Mom says you've had too many, or should I just give you what you want.

You pace, smoke and drink your coffee spilling it all over the floor. Mom yells again but you still try to get more. So we go outside and try to shoot the breeze. I try to understand you but your thoughts are out of reach. Sometimes I wish you could be more clear about the chaos in your head. There's nothing worse than a lost muse trying to raise the dead, or at least I thought that's what you said.

1987 Badass, dad said you'd never last.
1987 Badass, I love you so stuck in the past

You got a bus ticket to Baytown, went looking for Doris your one true love. No one knew where you went, and you took all the money that was for last months rent. Mom was sick and we were all spent. Doris wasn't around, you called dad from a pay phone. Alone in the parking lot in front of the Safeway. Next to the neighborhood where we used to live and play. 20 years later, you're still holding on to the memory of a girl who's been long gone.

You got arrested for sleeping on a car. We never understood how you even got this far. And then those cops chased you through the woods after that doctor sent you down the line. They all said you were fine, no reason for you to stay in that hospital, you were free, and the same day you came home and started tearing the limbs off some tree while screaming obscenities at strangers and mom and me. The streets weren't very nice to you but you still made it through. Something always there to save you from yourself. It sure wasn't the ones in charge of your mental health.


So you finally got a new apartment from the state, mom so worried you'd get kicked out with your dumpsterdiving treasures and and cigarette butts thrown all about. Your doctorizing was very impressive. One time you made some butterflies out of bread, I think that's what you said. Your creative touch was something I envied so much, I always wanted to be like you even though I knew all the pain it cost you.

1987 Badass, dad said you'd never last
1987 Badass, I love you so stuck in the past

shameless rhymes

these are just some random rhymes i've written lately....they don't all really relate but I just group them all together anyway...



It's such a cliche nowadays to say what you really feel.
All those emo kids trying so hard to be real.
Authenticiy is hard when it's part of the indie mass appeal.


My ears are ringing and my eyes are heavy, too many concerts, not enough love,
So any miles unplanned and unknown. Driving for this reason, Why am I always alone...

Trying to learn some Joni Mitchell songs, only she can say how I really feel.
She knows what it's like in this life to be fragile and white...
It's down to you but it's up to me,
Seems I hear her angel voice now so frequently

I just about ran off the road and I'm not even drunk.
I just had to write this down before I forgot.
Seems so important now.
This flat tire is proof.
I was stopped in my own tracks by this truth.
Got my pen ready and willing,
with my other shaky hand holding coffee as it's spilling.

I'm tired of being so introspective
Think I'm gonna move on back to Texas
Sure ain't got to worry about no exes
I know Austin is my home.
Tired of being here so alone.
Yea I'm a Texas girl at heart
Can't wait to get my airstream parked...

How many generations of beehives can you count in this Ruff family portrait? As Dolly would say, the higher the hair, the closer to heaven.

fried, dyed, and laid to the side

I found this cd at the public library. I had never heard his music before but I had to get it just for the pompadour. The librarian made the comment that his hair was "fried, dyed, and laid to the side." I said if his music if half as good as hair i'd be satisfied.

don't let the sun go down on your grievance

I can't stop listening to Daniel Johnston lately. If you haven't seen the film The Devil and Daniel Johnston, you simply must. He's a musician with bi polar disorder who makes the most painfully honest music I've ever heard. A friend of mine said he's too honest, which he may be but it just strikes such a chord with me. It's funny how he and Wesley Willis have some similar subject matter in their songs like the devil and even Casper the friendly Ghost. well, Wesley's song about Casper involves the friendly ghost being a homosexual so there's a difference there. But they both sing about issues of God and the devil and animals and such. Wesley has a song called "The Chicken Cow" and Daniel has a song called "Walking the Cow." I don't know, maybe it's just coincidence....And they're both diagnosed with some mental illness. That would be an interesting research paper I think. maybe in my free time....

T for Texas, T for Tennessee

sometimes i wished i smoked cigarettes. i know it sounds juvenile and makes no sense but it just looks cool. there's just such a nice aesthetic about it. it seems like all the cool people in history smoked like james dean and marlon brando, bob dylan, all the greats.maybe it's also because i grew up around smokers my whole life that i have a subconscious or not so subconscious affinity for the habit. i just love to watch people smoke. i just can't express how cool smoking is. everything about it is just so...cool....i can't think of any other word appartently to describe it. if only there were a way to smoke without all the nasty side effects. hmmm. this will be my next major project. come up with a way to smoke that is actually good for you and not detremental to your health.


in other happening in my life lately besides my daydreaming about old movie stars smoking, i came home last sunday to the welcoming smell of rotting food in my refrigerator. apparently when i left my apartment to go home for christmas break i accidentally turned off my breaker for the refrigerator instead of the hot water heater. in my defense they are not labeled at all so it was an honest mistake really. because of this mistake i've been spending the last week to try and get the smell out of the fridge. it's been sitting outside by my door for the last week so i can air it out. i guess a positive side of this situation is that it was about time for me to clean the fridge anyway so at least this kind of forced me to do it.

i also started my very last semester of grad school. i decided to take a couple more classes that i don't really need because if i take below 3 credit hours i have to start paying my student loans back this summer. i have no idea if i will have a job this summer. which is actaully a nice segueway to mention one of the classes i am taking which is called "homelessness in america." i think it's going to be a great class. the first day our professor played woody guthrie AND bob dylan. i was totally sold of course. it was really cool how she tied in the lyrics of this land is your land and bob's last thoughts on woody guthrie to talk about homelessness....the other two classes i'm taking are human sexuality and weight lifting. the sex class is the one i actually need to take, for my counseling certification and personal reasons. jk, sort of. the weight lifting i signed up for because i figured if i take a class where you are graded on exercising then i might actually do it. we'll see. i'm ready to get in shape though. by the end of this semester i will be putting arnie to shame. he's actually not looking too hot these days anyhow so that might not be very difficult.


in some good news i got to see willie nelson this week, again. i love how he never changes...anything. with other performers that might be annoying but with willie it's just kind of comforting in a way. like this guy has been around so long and he still sticks to what works. i actually got free tickets because, surprise, i hung out by the buses again. they were actually having some "special party" for people that had connections to the venue. this guy named harper asked me for a light and we started talking and i just casually mentioned that i didn't have any tickets and he just happened to have a few extra. the tickets were 54 bucks so there was no way i could afford one. it was just a really nice night. there were these younger dudes walking around and i just figured they were roadies or something but i found out later once i saw them on stage that one of them was Lucas, Willie's son, who had apparently grown up a lot since i last saw him a couple years ago on the ball part tour. he's gotten a lot beefier and grown some facial hair. i really didn't recognize him until i saw him on stage and he started doing the familiar weird stuff with his mouth like stevie ray vaughn used to do. he actually has his own band now that opened for willie called "40 point" i think. they played mostly covers but they were good ones. i was impressed with their versions of king harvest and jealous guy. Lucas sounds so much like willie though. it was almost hard to tell them apart at one point when they were doing a duet. i wished i had gotten some pictures but my digital camera decided to not work anymore unfortunately.

friday night fun

it's so nice to be spending hours in front of the computer not writing papers. i'm downloading a bunch of cds for my zune i bought from my brother like a long time ago. if you haven't heard the music of the Dirty Projector's, you must. it is so infectious. the most insane melodies i have ever heard. they take you on this glorious harmony joy ride, (as wesley willis would say), break it up with some chaos and then bring it all back again with a beautiful resolution in every song. i can't get enough of these guys.

i went to one of those 3d pink floyd show things. not the laser show, it's like a huge projector at the planetarium that projects these crazy images of clocks and other pink floyd related iconography and images that move and sway and it feels you're moving. i know there's a name for that kind of illusional stuff but i can't remember it. the dark side of the moon is playing as you lay down and watch this stuff on the ceiling for about an hour. it's pretty neat actually. i havne't really listened to floyd in a while but it brought back some memories of high school sitting in my room listening to them for really long amounts of time....

last night keri and i went downtown and started playing some lucinda williams songs that we learned. i think we're going to start a side of the road tour where we just play at random spots in town and see how much money people will actually give us.

last night was a riot for many reasons. first of all, corner pocket's is the best place in town to people watch. it's alocal bar for the "real" locals of tallahassee. the folks that have been born and raised here and probably been going to that bar since it opened. it's an interesting mix of florida red necks, ghetto fabulous, guys with haircuts from the early 90's with shiny shirts to match, older lesbians, some college kids thrown in (though not very many), this is not a college bar...lots of really drunk middle aged women with low rise tight jeans and bleach blond hair as well. they always get up and dance while Nathan and Brock are playing. Nathan and Brock are my friends who play gigs around town. I sing some Lucinda songs with them every once and a while. THey're really funny guys and play an awesome version of "business time" by flight of the conchords, a hilarious new zealand duo.

anywho, we get to corner pocket's last night and there's the usual crowd except they seemed to be in special form that night. one guy, we ended up naming "old man bill" was so drunk that it took him about 5 minutes to pick up a cigarette he dropped on the ground. he would just sit there for long amounts of time with his eyes closed and a slight grin on his face. then he would wake up and yell random things at the band like "you got some moody blues" and "you got the horns, the drums, and the guitar" over and over in a really exaggerated southern drawl. He'd also get up intermittently and give us his best drunk two step which was a real treat. as the band was packing up to to leave he kept yelling, "what are you doing, you ain't locking down yet." then there's "finch" who is guy that is there every time i go to corner pocket's. he's a true blue dead head and dances like the best dead head twirler you can find. he also does this weird clicking thing with his tonge that's really loud....the best conversation of the night had to have been had with a guy who said his middle name was "cross" he comes up to our table and asks us, "where are all the hot hotties" this was the most bizarre conversation i had ever had with another human being. i don't really know how to recreate how it went exactly but i did write down some of his more memorable quotes. yes, i had a notepad handy. we always need material for our band and this is the perfect place to get it. so here go the "Cross" quotes.

"My face is in overabundance,
...i'm not gonna worry about me, that's why i drink but i'm not gonna overdrink myself.
It's cool to meet your name...
These cloves smell really clovey
You guys aren't evil patrons, no matter what i say, you guys are good...

the best part was this one guy who just walked up in the middle of the band as they were playing and just stood by my friend callie as she was playing the djembe. then he tried to walk behind nathan as he was playing and tripped over the chair that had the tip jar and fell over hit and landed right on his rear and took a few glasses and an amp down with him. the band stopped playing of course and he looked like he had scraped his arm pretty good but was ok other than that and his bruised ego. he went straight back inside to the bar to get some more shots. i kinda felt sorry for him but that's what you get when you invade the band's space and you're really plastered.

i feel like i should bring a video camera there. this place is just fascinating.

i just ate a whole can of cream corn.

almost got run over at wal-mart

i almost got run over in the wal-mart parking lot the other day. i was actually trying to put my buggy back where they're supposed to go, not just in front of some random car like i usually do. jk, i would never do that, usually i just put it up on curb or something. i'm lazy, what can i say. so anywho, this white car just keeps backing up and i didn't notice it of course until it was almost too late. i think i was looking down at a gum wrapper or something interesting like that. so i look up and this car is not showing any sign of stopping. it's got sorority stickers on it and other crap like that decorating the back of it. it was filled with a bunch of college aged girls of course, i already mentioned the sorority stickers. so they drive off as i'm slightly startled. i was just going to go on my merry little almost got hit by sorostitues way, when i hear screaming coming from this pick up truck across from me with this bewildered looking middle school boy standing in front of this truck. this lady with bleach blond hair is sitting in the drivers seat screaming obscenities. then i realize that she is screaming at the car as it drives away. i was thinking, did they try to hit her too? but she was trying to stick up for me for almost being hit by these girls. i think she said, "i can't stand those kinds of people, they don't care cause they got daddy's money" and other various things that she would do to them if she could. i told her thanks for her concern and that i knew she had my back. i should have gotten her number or something. i may need a bodyguard someday.

dry rub

it's crunch time yet again. i didn't think i'd be worrying about finals on another fall semester but it has come to an end and i must force myself to muster up the motivation to write, hopefully, one of my last academic papers EVER! i really pulled a doozie this weekend. i could have been writing on my career counseling proposal that i've been dreading all semester but instead i spent all day yesterday trying to write a 6 page paper for the easiest class i've ever taken in grad school, chemical dependency, that should have only taken me a couple hours. because of my undiagnosed obsessive compulsive tendencies, i spent all day researching for a paper about schizophrenia and substance abuse, a subject which i happen to some things about and have written other paper on in the past but because of my overactive conscience, i would not allow myself to plaigarize myself and spent all day lethargically looking up new journals in order to use for this thing thinking that this paper was due today. but i find out in class that it's actually not due until next week so i wasted pretty much a whole weekend not working on my career counseling proposal that's due wednesday. cool huh. but i had a good time wasting time yesterday in the grad lab. my friend sara and i did a good job of entertaining ourselves while sort of pretending like we were trying to get work done. we have the same silly tendencies and a another lady in the grad lab who was actually working was trying to get our attention as sara was trying out a new dance move in her chair as i was evaluating it and sort of trying not to laugh too loud but not really succeeding. this nice lady was trying to get our attention and she politely waited for us to stop our shennannigan's before asking us to watch her bag while she stepped out for a minute. it's like she felt bad interrupting our juvenile behavior. these are the kinds of things that make me wonder how the hell i made it this far....

my career counseling professor, the same one who farted, had an "interesting" story to tell us in class last week. he said some random girl from memphis was looking up career centers and she came across FSU's and got his number and gave him a call. he ended up giving her some links to some other career sources and as a favor she sends him a big box of ribs from corky's bar be cue in memphis. which i opened my big mouth and piped up and told him i had eaten there as well. which i had because of when i lived in mississippi, we'd go to memphis to get out of hell for a while. anywho, he starts engaging me in this conversation about the ribs and he ends up asking me and i quote "are you a dry or wet rub kind of girl" referring to the ribs. i immediately said neither, that i like beef. then he goes on to say, oh are you from texas? they like their brisket down there. all i could do was nod yes at that point. the rest of the conversation just kind of trailed off. all i could hear was from then on was "dry or wet rub." and apparently that's all that my classmates could think of to say after class to me as well.

i also think that this is probably the funniest video i have ever seen.

stolen car

I came to All Saints today to try and get some work done on my proposal because the internet at my place has been hit or miss lately. I expected to have a nice quiet working environment because i figured everyone would be out of town because of the holidays. When I arrive, I hear yelling coming from somewhere and then one of the employees comes running out saying that some guy is trying to steal his friends car. I'm still kind of confused about the ligistics of this stolen car. All I know is there's a homeless guy with a drawing pad, ( whom i've seen a lot around here standing on the corner trying to sell his artwork of famous rock stars, he's actually quite good but i digress) trying to talk to this guy with red sunglasses who apparently is trying to steal the car and a bunch of other people standing outside calling people trying to get the "real" owner of the car to come out and claim his car while arguing this villain of this scenario i assume, the car stealer. Villain Red sunglasses guy is ranting and raving at these people rather feverishly but I can't really understand what he is saying. I am planting my butt inside through all of this as I take photos through the window, and Siamese Dream is playing in the background through all of this. I hadn't listened to this album in a while. Kind of fitting music for this moment I think. So me and the other innocent patrons are shrugging our shoulders at each other trying to figure out what's going on from a distance with our laptops and coffee protecting us hopefully if some other unforseen trouble occurs that would infiltrate inside this establishment . Then the cops show up and start padding this guy down and look through his wallet. I guess they're trying to figure out if he's really who he says he is. I don't have my little upload cord thingy so I can't upload them right now but I hope to have some proof of this happening on here soon. It's really very bazzar. Not what I expected on the day after Thanksgiving.

pie bite girl

I'm eating organic chocolate with ground up espresso beans mixed in while listening to physical graffitti. i didn't grind the espresso beans myself, they came that way with the chocolate. just so ya know. i hadn't listened to led zep in a looong time. its been a rare time lately that i just get in a led zeppy mood. so yea, its been a while since i've updated, yet again. i see a cycle here. maybe not. maybe more like a linear progression of writing and not writing. i'm confusing myself so i guess i'll get to the the latest or not so latest happening of my life lately. i really like adverbs by the way.

so basically here's the deal. i got my first official art therapy job working with kids in public school for the past couple of months who have "issues. " it's been interesting. i work with a music therapist one day a week and i enjoy seeing another side of creative therapy. we try to join forces of music and art to have one super creative therapy session! well on a good day that is....

secondly, i am also enrolled in two classes in order to further my career so i can get certified as a mental health counselor. basically i am never getting out of school. so back to the classes i am currently taking. one of which is probably the worst class i have ever had. exept my professor farted in class the other day which pretty much makes up for the misery we've gone through the whole semester. nobody aknowledged it either which made it even harder to contain myself. i just looked down at my desk trying not to lose it the rest of the class. i couldn't look him in the eye after that for fear of laughing in his face. he just went on like nothing ever happened. i would have at least said something, like my dad used to say, "did somebody step on a duck." i think my dad came up with that one on his own because i have never heard anybody else say that except him. this same man also playfully kicked me in the foot one time during a lecture. that was kind of odd i thought. there are also only six people in the class so we all have to sit up front and look like we're interested in what he's saying the whole 3 hours. and now i get to write a 20 page proposal of which i haven't even started. guess what i'm doing over thanksgiving!

i finally got my bike fixed. there's this place in town where you can go and actually build a bike from old bikes and parts they have lying around. it's called Krank It Up. I think i'm going to do a documentary on them. it's a really neat place. besides some of the hipster kids who hang around there who think they're cooler than everyone else because they ride a bike with dirty vans/cons, tattered t shirts and sweaty armpits. although they kinda grew on me after a while . they helped me fix my bike up and i've been riding it around town. i love riding my bike. i feel like a kid again. like i'm playing. it's a sweet one too. i'm going to take a pic of it with my holga and post it on here sometime. while i was at this coffee shop called All Saints the other day, this girl looks over at me and my bike and says, "Your bike looks like a pie and i want to take a bite out of it." When she left she said, "bye pie bite girl"

i've also been playing a lot of music. i finally learning how to actually play my guitar. it sure is nice to have patient friends who are also musicians who are way better than you but are willing to still put up with your lack of skill and actually teach you something. we jammed until 5 in the morning the other night. we're all going to start a band who plays on a couch. and call ourselves the rockabilly Keari's. except the e would be on top of the a like a cool play on letters because my other friend spells her name with an e and mine is with an a. makes sense huh. as we were jamming this other girl down the hall who plays the oboe? showed up and she spells her name exactly like mine. it's all about the kaeri's lately. kaeri's just attract more kaeri's.

i'm going to see "into the wild" tonight. it looks really good. sean penn directed it i think. it's about that guy who went to Alaska to rough it in the woods. sounds like my kinda man.

Adios, mi corazon

i'm listening to the album "Dylan" that a friend of mine let me borrow a few days ago. It hasn't been in circulation on cd ever and there are only the few vinyl precious copies that you may be lucky to find. I am lucky enought to know someone who has it so i feel lucky indeed. I love it, it's basically all covers but he has his twangy countryesque voice and it's just wonderful. I can't stope listening to the song called "Spanish is the loving tongue" I think I've played it over at least 25-30 times in the last few days.

i went to the beach yesterday for the first time this summer. it was so nice, the weather was perfect, not too hot with a few clouds in the sky so we weren't sweltering. there was an unusual amount of seaweed laying around though. it looked like some kind of moster washed up on the beach, kind of like something out of star wars.

i keep procrastinating on writing about the "Europe trip" i don't know why i put off writing in this thing so much. I wrote in a journal for about half of the trip. There was so much happening that it became overwhelming to keep it up. I almost feel like I should just go ahead and write a book...

I feel like I have been having pretty much a perfect summer. It started out with a trip of a lifetime then I come back to my favorite place in Georgia, Dahlonega and just relax from my trip and sit on the porch and drink coffee and visit old friends. Now I am back in Tally and my days have consisted of playing tennis, singing Lucinda Williams songs at bars, learning guitar, indulging in too many hours online and zoning out on my couch, thrift shopping, and just seeing my favorite band Black Rebel Motorcylce Club on my birthday. It sure is a nice switch from last summer. Oh and of course there is school, we have our first weekend workshop this weekend. And I have a lot to do on my final project but for some reason this isn't really phasing me right now, I know I will get it done. Plus I got a job offer in Snellville. It was funny how it happened, I was leaving the day before my birthday to go se BRMC in Atlanta and I got a call just before I was leaving to drive up there and it was a man from Eastside Heritage whom I had called about 3 months ago looking for a place to apply for a job for our special projects for class. They didn't have any opening at the time but now they do. So I ended up having an interview with him the next day, which happened to be my birthday. It was really weird and seemed like more than a coincidence. It's funny how important things have been happening in my life on my birthdays the last few years. I was filmed in a documentary about Dylan fans on my bday a couple years ago and now this. I don't know, i thought it was kind of interesting.

the tennis court is calling and i have some balls to smash, hehe.

PARIS!!

I feel like I should write about Paris right now, I'll write about the incredible trip following Bob later. I didn't go to London after all actually, I was supposed to stay with my second cousin Kara but I couldn't because she is an editor of a magazine and she had an unexpected job in Miami she had to fly to. So I spent the last week of my European stay in Paris! I met some wonderful new friends who were so kind and let me stay with them. I stayed with a lady from the West Indies named Caroline who is also a wonderful vegan cook! I ate really well in Europe! Her friends were so kind and took me around the city to all the places I wanted to go. Sandrine was a wonderful tour guide, she is also from the west indies and we had fun walking down the Champs Elysees in the rain. I went to the top of the Eiffel Tower and to the Louvre in one day. I only saw a fraction of the museum but I'm glad I got to see all of my favorite Renaissance Italiam painters. It was so amazing to see all those paintings I studied in art history in real life and to see all the cracks and brushstrokes up close. I took a boat ride alond the Siene that went by all the major monuments in Paris. It is truly the most beautiful city that I've ever seen. Not that I've been to a lot of major cities but it just took my breath away. I ate the most delicious crepes on the boat. Sandrine and I got salmon and spinach crepes with fresh cream. they literaly melted in my mouth. One of my favorite activities of the whole trip was people watching. There were so many people with dogs and old men wearing berets holding baugettes just like in the movies. it was so surreal...People in Paris are so stylish, I had fun just looking at what people are wearing, they had such a keen sense of style, very polished and put together. there were some funny accessories, especially the many man purses i saw. my favorite one was a knock off louis vutton purse this one guy was wearing. hilarious. there were also a lot of sweaters being worn tied over the shoulders. there was a lot of knock off brands being worn, especially dolce & gabana. i saw a lot of that in italy as well, but i'll get to that later... but overall i envied the style of the french women. i also felt like a giant compared to everyone, they are so small! everything there is small, the people, the cars, the streets, everything. sandrine was also making fun of the way i talked because she said that americans always sound like they are shouting when they talk. i love french, it is such a beautiful language. sandrine and caroline were trying to teach me a little french and i gave them some lessons in english as well. they both spoke english but they really wanted me to correct them if they said anything incorrectly. i felt kind of inadequate to do that because i feel like i always don't know the right grammer like i should. hehe. but we helped each other out as best as we could. there were some really funny moments of me and sandrine trying to communicate with each other. i would say the phrase, "a couple" and she always asked me what i meant. i really learned on this trip how much i take for granted in america how easily it is to communicate with everyone. well, for the most part, just speaking in language terms. but anywho, it was so difficult at times for me to communicate with a lot of people in paris. i really had to rely on non verbal cues. one funny incident happened on the train, i was loading the film in my three cameras and this man sitting across from me started laughing and he started saying something to me in french but he soon learned i didn't speak french. through very limited vocabulary and a lot of hand motions we were able to talk, albeit, very limitedly. i learned that he was a professional p hotographer in paris and showed me his gigantic digital camera. he was very nice and would just laugh when we reached a point where we just couldn't rely on our limited vocabulary and hand motions to get our points across. that only gets you so far.

i am so dumbfounded about how i even survived in paris. without knowing the language, not knowing anyone, i was really flying by the seat of my pants without a clue. but God made a way where there was none and provided for all of my needs and allowed me the trip of a life time.

the "foir de paris" which is a huge market in paris that only happens once a year for about a week was awesome. i only saw a small portion of it because it was so huge. i saw native west indie people make their homemade coconut ice cream which was delicious. i saw many handmade baskets and authentic west indies clothes.

More later, je fatigue...

I'M BAAAAAAACK

I arrived back in the good old USA tuesday May 15th to the sight of that familiar red Georgia mud and I couldn't have been happier. There's just nothing like coming home, eventhough I had the time of my life in Europe. I dare to say I almost feel like a different person after this trip. I know a lot of people say they feel changed after their first trip overseas but in my case it is definitely true. I have too much to say and too little time to say it right now but I promise there will be a series of blogs about this trip coming in the near future. right now i am enjoying being in the mountains and hanging out with my mom and friends here in Dahlonega. Life is truly great.

so long marianne

i feel so relaxed right now i could probably fall asleep while typing this post so if my head happens to fall over onto the keyboard as i write and the rest of it consists of unintelligible or repeated letters sorry. i just took a hot bath after the pilates class i've been going to with my buddy andrew from class. i LOVE pilates, it's a really good workout but relaxing at the same time. i'm totally sold. i'm still getting used to some of the moves but it helps to have a friend there to laugh at each other as our butts are sticking up in the air and other awkward positions you find yourself in in that class sometimes.

i've had a good couple of weeks, i sold some of my artwork in the annual juried rollins art show here at fsu. i won an award for one piece, 50 bucks. the school bought a photograph i took of an alligator at sapelo that was part of my senior show for undergrad which was $200. i kind of wished i had upped the prices now! oh well, not bad for starting out. and another professor wants to buy another photograph from the sapelo series. Lord knows i need the cash right now.....since i'm going to Paris in like 2 weeks! i'm gonna need that moola for about a thousand rolls of film i'm going to use while i'm there, hehe. that reminds me i need to get another holga, the ones i have now have too many light leaks which can be interesting but its become a little too much to where its not complimenting the picture but becoming more of a distraction. i've noticed the longer i use a holga the more light leaks it gets. well what can you expect from a plastic camera, i still love that thing though, i will forever be indebted to it for bringing a whole new dimension to my photography. reminds me of the little cheer we used to chant in the darkroom at north georgia, HOLGA....HOLGA....HOLGA. original i know, you have to hear the tone of voice to get the full effect of course. ahh memories of the darkroom, i miss it so much, i am determined to get back in there this summer dangit...

it's been interesting at my internship this week. i work at pyramid studios which is an art studio for developmentally delayed adults and i had this whole really cool art exercise prepared. it's kind of hard to explain but basically it involved balloons. well, the balloons kept popping if you just touched it wrong, no sharp objects in sight. that's the last time i buy cheap balloons from teh dollar store. you'd think a balloon is a balloon. anyway, a few balloons popped in my clients faces and needless to say the whole place was in an uproar for a little while after that. i felt so bad because some are really sensitive to loud noises so that was not good. it was a learnig experience needless to say.

and i just discovered how good leonard cohen is as a songwriter, i had heard of him before and just lumped him together with all those 70s singer songwriters. and that all the really knowledgeable music snobs say you're supposed to like. i love the feeling when you discover a new musician that is so good and you keep wanting to hear more and more. patty griffin is another one i'm really getting into right now. i guess you could say she's in the alt country category, you could put her in the same sentence with lucinda williams but they're still totally different.

a funny thing happened on the way to the dentist

I had a dream the other night that Prince was my dentist. He was wearing that yellow suit he wore to the Oscars this year. I was embarrassed for him to look at my mouth because apparently on the way there one of my front teeth fell out and i didn't want him to think I didn't take care of my teeth. I wouldn't open my mouth when I finally arrived and he kept trying to get me to smile by singing in his usual high pitch range which he thought was funny as well in the dream. Then when i finally did smile he he started laughing at me but then he tried to cover it up by saying I was still cool. After the dream analysis class i took last semester you'd think i'd be able to disect this one but i'm at a loss. feel free to give any opinions of what this might possibly mean!

THANK YOU!

I just wanted to tell everybody who has been praying and thinking about my dad through his surgery thank you so much. I can't thank you enough for your support. He is doing excellent by the way and he is coming home today sometime. After his surgery yesterday he was a little whoozy at first of course, but he was back to himself in no time. That's what is so scary about brain surgery because there is always that chance that you may not be the same person when you wake up but he was already cracking his usual jokes and making references to the hospital bills so we knew he was ok! His whole head is wrapped in white gauze that kind of makes a dome shape on the top of his head which looks like a turbin and we've all been teasing him that we should paint it pastel colors to look like an Easter egg just in time for the season. He said he scared himself when he caught a glimpse of himself in the reflection of the paper towel dispenser with his new "hat" anywho I can't believe how soon they're sending him home but the doctor says he is doing great so I won't argue with that! I'm just so glad it's over, surgery sucks! especially in your brain...but yea, thank you thank you thank you for everything. It is going to take a couple months before his incision is completely healed and he can get back to doing his usual stuff which will be kind of hard on him but the alternative is much worse i would say. There is still a chance for infection from the wound so I would appreciate it if you would continue to pray that everything heals quickly and safely. But the worst is over thank God...

Now all I need prayer for is that I get everything done I need to do for school in less than a month. I can't believe how fast this semester has flown by and I feel like I've been the biggest slacker ever since I started grad school. It's technically my last semester before I graduate in August besides a few weekend workshops in the summer and our final project which I don't forsee being that difficult. I guess you could call it burn out. I just really don't have the motivation right now, I'm so done with school but knowing that I'm going to France in a month is what's keeping me going! I AM GOING TO SEE BOB DYLAN IN PARIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm going to stay in France for about a month to visit Molly in Lille as well. I'm going to try and travel around as much as possible while I'm there. I really want to go to Amsterdam and London too. We'll see. I'm just happy to get out of the country for the first time EVER! I've been practicing my French etiquitte. well not really, I've just been trying to find french looking clothes and listening to french music. I bought this shirt yesterday at Plato's closet that is navy and white striped and my friend told my it looked very french last night and I didn't even mention anything about going to France yet! I was really stoked about that! I'm really getting into Brigitte Bardot's style right now. She was such a cool chic. And Molly, I am so glad you introduced me to Serge Gainsbourg, his stuff is amazing. I wasn't sure if I really liked it at first but the more I listen to it the more I love his sound eventhough I can't understand what he's saying....I freaking LOVE Bonnie and Clyde! I can't stop listening to it!